Simple and Complicated

     What is complicated?  Things get complicated sometimes, and I never seem to see it coming.  I wonder why?  I know life isn't as simple as it might seem.  Something seems simple, and then suddenly, it's complicated.  I'm not even sure how to put this stuff into words.

Here's simple:

1+1=2

     That's pretty simple, right?  Well, maybe not for some people.  I do know a few who couldn't figure that out.  But for me, it's simple.  And while I'm looking at that, realizing how simple it is, here comes some idiot who writes this kind of crap on the blackboard next to me:

     What the hell is this shit?  It's so complicated!  Maybe to the guy who wrote it it's pretty simple?  But to me, I can't even figure out what it's supposed to mean!  So what, am I a caveman now when it comes to math?  Probably.  I've been out of school for so long, and honestly never really progressed past high school math.  Have I made a point here?  Probably not.  Sometimes things are just all mixed up and...complicated.  I wish they were still simple, but they aren't.

     I like to write.  Simple, right?  Not really.  I can write any kind of book I want, even self publish it afterwards.  But then things get complicated.  Should I try and find a literary agent?  Should I try to hook myself up with a small publisher?  Maybe I should self publish the book?  If I self publish something I have to make up my own book cover, or pay someone to make a cover for me.  I have to promote the book myself.  How much will it cost?  Will I get a few and sell them personally?  How about taxes?  Should I donate books to libraries?  Will libraries even take my books?  Will...should...I just...AAAAUUUUGGGGHHH!

     Now writing is complicated.  Now it's no longer about the story I wrote, and has just become complicated!  Pure things never seem to stay pure!  And have I made my point yet?  No.  Why?  Because it's COMPLICATED!

     I see things as how I want them to be.  How simple they could be.  But still, they get complicated.  I'm sure at least one person will read this and know what it's really about.  And what is it really about?  It's...complicated.  Maybe more than one will read it and think they understand?  Who knows?  That would be really funny, actually.  Have you read this and thought that I was maybe writing about something in your life?  You thought things were simple, but before you knew it, they became really complicated?

Snow

     I love snow.  I'll admit there have been a few days in my life when I was shoveling it off a driveway when I wasn't really happy with it, but still, I like it.  And shoveling helps keep me in shape, right?  So it's all good.  It's 2011 and like normal, people are bitching about the snow.  They don't like driving in it, the roads aren't plowed, they're so jealous of us people who live in places where it doesn't snow.  But since I'm not in snow right now, let's look at some pictures!  Hooray!

     Wow, this is so beautiful!  It's so...icy!  It's so...where are the houses?  Where the hell is this?  Someone went out in the middle of nowhere and took a picture of a snow covered tree?  That's real snow love!  I applaud that effort!  (But where the hell is this?)

     The Europeans don't have these problems, do they?  It doesn't snow in, say...Italy.  Or does it?  It did snow when I was stationed over there, but they told us that was the first time it had snowed there in like 30 years!  Maybe I brought it with me?  That's silly!  How could I bring weather with me someplace?  So it doesn't snow in Italy normally, right?  RIGHT?

     Oh...an Italian road.  No, I don't know where the hell this is, it's in Italy somewhere, ok?  The road sign says something like Milano, or something.  So go look up Milano on Google if you want to know where this is.  But still, it just makes the roads nice and white, right?  Just pretty snow.  I'm sure this car is cruising along with no problems at all.  Get your windshield scraped, your heater going, and you're set, right?  Why do you people keep complaining?  Snow isn't a problem!

     Ok, so it's a problem for these girls.  Maybe if they were bright enough to wear pants instead of shorts it would be less of a problem?  Or maybe if they were driving on a plowed road they wouldn't have to push?  But maybe they were going someplace where the roads haven't been plowed yet, you ask?  Ok, where the hell would they be going?  Do you see any buildings in this picture?  Any trees?  These women in shorts are out on the damn tundra!  It looks to me like they drove their little car, in their little shorts, out into a field full of snow.  Boo fricking hoo.

     It doesn't snow here in Las Vegas, though.  This place is right in the middle of the Mohave desert.  It doesn't snow in the desert.  It might be fun if it did, but it doesn't.  I said it DOESN'T!  Ok, for crying out loud!

     No, these aren't from this year.  It was supposed to maybe snow here this year, and I think a few flakes fell, but nothing like what's in these pictures.  It doesn't really snow here.  All this snow you see what gone after an hour or two.  I had some personal pictures of the snow on my porch, and a snowman I made, but because the camera is a bit old, and the memory card won't fit in my laptop, I can't show them to you.  Feel free to trudge through the snow to visit me (If you're coming from a snowy place, that is) and I'll show them to you on the camera.

     So here's to snow!  Or damn the snow, depending on where you live.  I have a friend who lives in Michigan who hates the snow.  So for her, damn the snow!  (But for me, it sure is pretty!)

Convention mania!

     It's January and the start of a new year.  2011 starts out with a bang and the Consumer Electronics Show is in Las Vegas and will be showing off all the newest electronic stuff of the year!  And I can't go to it.  Invitation only.  That's sucks!  I can see some things on tv, but it's not like really being there.  I can't really see the 3-D tvs and how they work, I can't play with the new cell phone types that are coming out.  But I guess everything will be in stores in a few months anyway.  I still probably won't be able to play with the stuff though, because I probably won't be able to afford any of it!

     But there's another convention in town, too.  It always comes at the same time as CES.  It's the Adult Entertainment Expo.  And yes, it's exactly what you think it is!  Ha Ha!  All the porn people are here!  (Well, the porn people are always here in Vegas, but now there's a convention full of them!)

     So now what kinds of things will you get to see here?  The usual: you can meet porn stars, go to booths promoting porn movies and take pictures and get autographs from the stars, they give out free stuff like cds, dvds, posters, and all kinds of things.  And then there's the weird stuff.  Before you ask, no I didn't go to this.  I had to work.  If I wasn't working, I do wonder myself if I might have actually gone to see it.  I mean how many times do you actually get the chance to go to something like this?  So what the hell, right?  Nasty, but still a new experience.  It would have probably been more fun when I was in my 20's, though.

     In checking in to this...expo, I found a few really...different things.  How about this?

     Please tell me what this is.  Those aren't...they can't...wow.  Do you suppose it has it's own fake saliva?  I mean, it wouldn't feel right to just be whacked with a bunch of fake tongues if there wasn't any saliva, right?  RIGHT?  Oh man, I am SO creeped out by this right now!  On the other hand, if I saw this spinning, and someone bending over in front of it, I don't think I would be able to stop laughing!

     And, of course, there's the "Welcome to Vegas" doll.

     Are these the weirdest things, though?  Oh no, not by a long shot!  After 4 years in the U.S. Air Force I can say that I've seen my share of pornography.  I've seen movies with fat chicks, and midgets.  I've seen a "horse show" and even a movie of a girl with a great dane.  And those are weird, yes.  But are you really ready for weird?  Are you ready for...ROXXXY the sex doll?

     Roxxxy talks and responds to you.  She responds when you touch her.  She's programmed to know where you touch her.  And strangest of all, Roxxxy is programmed with five different personalities:

Wild Wendy - Outgoing and adventurous.  She'll encourage anything you do to her.

S&M Susan - This one likes...pain/pleasure?  (What the hell?  A doll that likes to be beat up?)

Young Yoko - The description says "Barely 18, and ready to be taught."  Wow, how...illegal?

Mature Martha - Experienced teacher.  Via Youtube, I actually heard this one say, "I've been around the block a few times."  Does that mean...is this one a used doll?  Like a friend of mine would say, "Ewwwww!"

And my ultimate favorite, the one I can't figure out why you would want at all:

Frigid Farrah - The description says "Reserved and shy."  But on one video a guy touched the doll, and it replied back to him, "Don't touch me there."  You need a doll to tell you that?  You can't just find real women to tell you not to touch them?  How...creepy!  "Put your pants back on!  I just want to think about work!  Stop it!"  Someone will actually pay for a doll that says this to them.  I can easily find real women who will treat me like shit, and for free, too!

     I guess the doll was designed with some movement.  To me, it just looked like it kind of rocked back and forth.  They bent her (it?) over a chair and then filmed it while it rocked back and forth for a bit.  Shortly after the video started though, a tech came into the frame, removed the wig from the doll, and opened the head, which really creeped me out!

     The doll supposedly has a heartbeat and a working circulatory system.  It's (sorry, I can't call a doll "she") supposed to feel warm, and the skin supposedly feels real.  How do you make fake skin feel real? "It puts the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again!"  Sorry, Jodie Foster moment.  And what can you expect to pay for this wonder of woman replacement?  Well, it, she, or they are on sale!  Only $2,995.00!  How about that?  Let's get our check books out!  Who needs a brand new 3-D tv that can be controlled by my cell phone when I can have a sex doll that tells me no instead?  If you want the male version, it's only $1,495.00.  There weren't any pictures of those, though.  I'm not even sure if the males had personalities, either.  I'm sure the male doll doesn't say no!  or maybe it does?  Maybe I need to buy one of each, set them on a couch next to each other, and then watch them argue.

"Don't touch me!"

"Don't touch me either!"

"I don't want to sit next to you!"

"I can't move, but you're a bitch!"

"You're so mean, I hate you!"

     Arguing dolls.  And all for around $4,500.00 after sales tax.  Just what the world needs.  So what the hell was I writing about in the first place here?

     Oh yeah, CES is in town!  Wow, I wish I could go to that and see all the neat, new, electronic stuff!  I'll just pretend it's the only convention here, too.  And since I can't go anyway, because I have to work, I'll just pretend that if I wanted to, I could actually get in.

*sigh*

Are Oompa Loompas and flying monkeys normal?

     It's the start of 2011 and time to take stock of our lives.  And I find myself wondering if I'm actually living a normal life.  I'm pretty sure I'm not.  I've been reading a friend's upcoming book (she was nice enough to give me a sneak peek before it's published) and notice how the problems in the book don't really relate to the kind of problems I have here in my life.  I know her book is fiction, but it's about romance, and unhappy marriages, and kids, and...well, things like that.  A rekindled romance, and how things eventually worked out.  Meanwhile, here's my life:

     After working Saturday night and finishing off a wild and stupid New Year's Eve, I was invited to a party with my coworkers.  It was to be held at a strip club called "Hustler's."  Yes, related to the magazine. A lovely morning of drinking, sleazy women, and discussing how we watched idiots beat on each other and destroy property all weekend.  Since I don't drink, I declined.  Someone received a call from "Hustler's" before our shift was over though, and was told that the place had to "close prematurely before the party" and would be unavailable to us.  So were they raided?  Maybe didn't have an up to date liquor license and were caught?  I don't know, they didn't want to tell the reason why.

     So the get together was moved to some other place.  I think it was moved to some place called "Crazy Horse 3?"  I tried, but couldn't even download any pictures of that place.  Since I don't drink, don't really care for people that much, and didn't feel like dropping a few hundred dollars or more on some stripper who I'd probably never see again (Unless of course I went back to the club to drop even more money), I still declined to go to this place, too.  I overheard them telling one coworker who isn't well liked (Ok, no one likes him) to meet at a dumpster on the corner of Tropicana and Maryland Parkway.  I wonder if he actually showed up there and waited for other people?

     Do other people go to strip joints to celebrate surviving New Year's weekend?  I wonder how the party went?  One guy told me, "You don't have to worry about the strippers, we'll have our own room with all the beer we can drink!"  So...they have a rented room at a strip joint and no strippers will come into the room, huh?  Somehow I don't think a strip joint rents out rooms like that.  I wonder if anyone got into trouble, and who was the first person thrown out?

     I grew up in an area where there weren't too many divorced people.  Here it seems like everyone is either divorced, or cheating on their wife.  Or cheating on their girlfriend.  Or cheating on the girl they're cheating on their girlfriend, or wife with.  This place is nothing like where I grew up.  I have two friends who call where they live "Villages."  I thought villages were tiny little hamlets that only existed in movies now.  I guess I'm wrong.  One lives in a little village in England, and the other a little village in Michigan.  Who knew there were villages in Michigan?

     There's an old Chinese curse that goes: "May you live an interesting life."  I wonder if I've been cursed like that?  I certainly live an interesting life.  I go to work to see domestic violence between people, thefts, hookers, drunks, and all manner of insanity.  I live in a world of neon now.  A world that looks good on the outside, but inside is full of greed, and violence.  I do wonder occasionally if I moved somewhere else, found another job that didn't involve all of this, would I be bored now?  Even if I do leave eventually, I'll never think about Las Vegas the same way again.

And all I can say for 2011 is wow.

New Year's Eve 2010

     Goodbye 2010.  It's part of the past now.  So what did I do to survive that wild night a few days ago?  Well, it started out the same as it does every year.  The police block off Las Vegas Blvd and so I can't use the strip to get to where I'm supposed to park at work.  I have to drive down to Tropicana avenue and then sit in traffic for about 45 minutes while trying to turn on Koval to get to the parking area.  Meanwhile, I'm surrounded by idiots who still think they can make it to the closed Strip from Tropicana (Most of these idiots are locals) and cabs.  They're all trying to cut me and each other off.  I guess if you cut everyone around you off, you get where you're going much faster.  I played the game too, and cut off people who were trying to cut me off.  So it was one, huge mess of idiots trying to cut each other off while driving about a half a mile an hour.

     I had to leave for work 2 hours ahead of time to get through this mess!  But finally, I arrive at the parking area.  I'm thrilled!  Now all I have to do...is...what the hell?  Almost the whole damned lot is full of cars!  Oh, ok.  Now I remember that both Luxor, and Excalibur employees are parking in the lot this year.  No matter, I'm sure there's a spot somewhere...somewhere...uh...DAMN IT!  I finally find a spot, but end up having to park waaaaaaay in the back of the lot.  I guess I get some exercise walking out of the lot.  There is a shuttle bus for the really lazy employees, but I refuse to ride a bus across the street.  I did however, get a nice shot of Luxor from where I ended up parking.  Oooooo, how dark and forbidding!  Just looks like trouble to me.

     So now I've parked, and head across the street.  It's not like years ago when the streets were full of idiots.  Tonight there are idiots wandering around, but the street's still a bit empty.  Maybe the 33 degree temperature kept some of them inside?  Who knows?  I snap a nice picture while crossing the blocked off street.

     And if you look down the other way, here are the paramedics and the police!  I'm sure they were really happy to be out in the cold!

     I cross the street and head into the employee areas quickly, trying not to let any of the screaming, drunken idiots on the sidewalk talk to me.  I get lucky and none of them slur any questions at me.  I make it down to the security briefing room to see how disorganized things are.  It doesn't look too bad, but then I haven't started my shift yet.  So far, it's fun.  That fun will stop soon.

     I get clocked in and briefing for the night starts.  Like normal, it doesn't make much sense, and is mostly the managers trying to whine about how they aren't "abrasive" and how they are supposed to be nice to everyone.  No wonder people get away with just about anything they want here.  Sheesh.  Finally, briefing ends and I head out to dispatch with my partner.  As we get there, the phones are ringing off the hook with idiots asking "Am I getting relieved now?  Can I leave and go to lunch now?  Where's my relief?"  I'm not a supervisor and really not concerned about whether I'm "abrasive" or not, so I scream into the radio for people to STOP CALLING DISPATCH TO ASK IF THEY ARE BEING RELIEVED!  A supervisor comes on the radio and tells me not to talk to people that way, and to be nice.  Now I wonder when I'm going to get relieved, and I haven't even been at work an hour yet!  Ok, the fun's ended.

     It's constant chaos in dispatch on New Year's Eve.  The phone rings, and rings, and rings, and people want this, and want that, and want, want want!  I do the best I can and work my way through the chaos. I do have a couple other dispatchers helping me...or was I helping them?  Who knows?  It's all one big blur.  Before I know it, it's midnight.  For at least a second or two I think the loud booms I hear are thunder.  Then I realize it's the Vegas fireworks going on.  I get up and walk out the dispatch door to get a picture of them!  And, of course, I can't really see them.  But I get a shot of a few sparks, and some smoke:

     Should I have then been wondering what the new year will bring me?  What's in store?  Where will I go from here?  Actually, I just went back into dispatch and did the best I could.

     As far as I've heard, there were somewhere around 100 driving while intoxicated arrests.  Those are just the arrests, mind you, I'm sure there were ten times that amount of drunken people driving around who didn't get caught.  One Mexican was killed because he was out firing a gun into the air and when the police arrived and told him to stop, he pointed his gun at them and said no.  His family claims that he didn't know they were police.  I guess wearing a police uniform and yelling "Police, put the weapon down!" wasn't enough identification for them.  (This wasn't at the casino, by the way, it was out in town somewhere.)  There were robberies, and beatings, fireworks and booze, kisses and hugs.  Did things look hopeful to me for 2011?  I don't know.  Things looked violent.  But I guess we'll just have to wait and see what comes.

Stay safe.

Once more into the breach...

     Ok, I've got about a half an hour before I try to get to work.  I say try because I don't know how bad the traffic will be tonight.  Right now it's about 7:30 pm on 12/31/10.  I have to get to the Las Vegas Strip, which by the way has now been shut down to car traffic by the police, by 10pm.  And then the real chaos will begin, I'm sure.

     New Year's Eve in Las Vegas is...how do I describe it?  Wild, stupid, dense, a pain in the butt, maniacal, sinister...  The fountains will probably end up full of vomit, and the streets full of trash.  There will be fights, arrests, violence, screaming, noise, and complete insanity.  Everything that I loved when I was younger...and hate now that I'm older.  It's funny how we change like that, isn't it?

     I'll have one of the best seats in the house for this year.  I'll be a Security Dispatcher.  While handling about 400 phone calls, and sending officers here and there, I'll somehow find time to use the cameras to watch the screaming crowd...the cameras don't have sound by the way, so I get to watch them with relative quiet.  I'd like to put on my Ipod while I watch them and have some cool music playing (Maybe the piano tune "The Entertainer?" *chuckle*), but will have to listen to the security radio instead.  And actually, that might have quite a bit of comedy come through itself!

"Big Sal to Control, I have a man here who hasn't checked in yet, do we have any rooms available for the night?"

"Control to Big Sal, you were told in briefing the entire city is sold out for tonight!"

"I understand that, but do we have any rooms available?"

"No...I just told you we're sold out!"

"Ok, he wants to know where he can go then."

     I'm sure I'll have a crowd of "Big Sals" to deal with.  No one seems to listen, especially when we're busy.

"Control to available units, there's a fight at the Mambo Bar!  Repeat, fight at the Mambo Bar, get over there!"

"Charlie Six and Charlie Seven responding!"

"Copy Six and Seven, let me know what's going on and keep me informed."

"Big Sal to Control, I think there's something going on over at the Mambo Bar."

"Yes, there's a fight!  Head over and assist Charlie Six and Seven!"

"I think it's a fight.  Did you want me to go over there?  This is Big Sal again, by the way."

"I read you, Big Sal!  yes, get over to the Mambo Bar!"

"Charlie Six to Control, multiple injuries, and we have one in custody.  We're taking him to the security office."

"Copy Charlie Six."

"Big Sal to Control, I'm over at the Mambo Bar now, and I don't see a fight."

"We have one in custody, Big Sal, head over to the security office!"

"But what about the fight?  Shouldn't I find the fight first?  This is Big Sal, by the way."

     Obviously any headaches I get tonight will probably be because of "Big Sal" and not the loud, insane, screaming crowds of people!  And for my coworkers who read this and think about asking me who "Big Sal" is:  Look around you, if you can't recognize him, he may be you!  *chuckle*

     So for tonight, pray for me.  Hold high hopes for me, and have a good time yourself.  And for "Big Sal"...START PAYING ATTENTION, YOU MORON!

How to annoy Vegas hookers

     I've been in Security for almost 8 years now, and have dealt with a lot of hookers in Las Vegas.  Actually, you can't really call them hookers because most of them get guys drunk, take them back to their hotel room, and then rob them after they pass out.  So they really aren't having sex for money, they're just female thieves.

     Anyway, after watching them, and dealing with them for as long as I have, I have a few suggestions if you happen to be taking a trip to Las Vegas and would like to have a bit of fun annoying these...women.  This should be really fun!  If you're a guy, you won't have to seek these girls out, they'll find you.  Trust me, sit at a bar in the middle of a busy casino all by yourself and they'll show up and start talking to you.  When one does, just start in like this:

1.  When she starts talking to you, tell her you really like her, but your wife is sitting at a table behind you.  When she turns around to look, yell as loud as you can, "NO, DON'T LOOK AT HER!"

2.  This one is a bit complicated, but still should be really fun.  Watch the bar and find the largest (fattest) girl you can that is talking to all the men sitting at the bar.  Go and start talking to her.  If she decides to give you a price, or maybe says she'd like to go back to your room, take her up on it.  Now, go up into the hotel hallways, but don't go to your room.  Start telling her that you have to get to your room quickly before your roommate gets back, and get her jogging up and down the hallways.  At the end of each hallway, tell her you thought your room was there, but it's in a different hallway.  Keep her jogging around the halls for as long as you can.  See if you can get her out of breath.  When she finally has enough, and tells you she's leaving, yell "OH SHIT, IT'S SECURITY!" and run like hell!  She'll more than likely run again, too.

Now, after she leaves, go back to the bars downstairs and try to find her again.  If you do, try and pick her up again!  Tell her you know where your room is now, and if she actually follows you, jog her around some more!  She'll come if she thinks you have a lot of cash in the room.  Tell her you couldn't figure out the hotel room safe and so the $5,000 cash you brought with you is in a sock under your pillow.  Quite a few will follow you.

3.  If you're able to pick one up in the bar, especially if she's quoted you a price, take her up to your hotel room, but ask her to wait outside for a few minutes while you get rid of your roommate.  Then go inside your room and call security.  Tell them there is a strange woman outside your room and she won't leave you alone!  Ask for help and sound all panicked.  Security will show up and take her away.

4.  Find where the Security Podium is in the casino.  Now go and let a hooker pick you up in a bar and tell her you need to get some money from an ATM.  Instead of going to an ATM, walk her over to the Security Podium, and announce as loud as you can, "This woman has agreed to have sex with me for money!  Do you have a house doctor that can check her for diseases?"  Be forewarned, this will not go over well with either security, or the hooker, but it'll be funny, I promise!

     Yes, these ideas are very rude.  But let's remember that these women are in the casinos and bars to rob men.  Most have been in and out of jail quite a bit.  If they get the chance, they'll take everything you have.  So remember that if you start feeling sorry for them.  They are out there so frequently that there are even security officers who know a lot of them by name.  "Hi Bambi, you know you aren't supposed to be in here.  Time to head out!"

     So have fun with them, but use a lot of caution.  Some of them do carry weapons, pepper spray, and who knows what else.  There is also a percentage of girls working the Las Vegas Strip who have AIDS!  Yes, I said AIDS.  So while this blog is fun and might make you laugh, in all honesty, leave the working girls alone.  Prostitution is a two way street and I usually won't feel bad for some idiot who take a hooker up to his room, falls asleep, and then wakes up to find all his money and stuff gone.

A famous writer

     A long time ago I met another author who wanted to swap book reviews.  I was good with that, it's always good to have reviews of your books.  Her name is Dawne Prochilo, and I read her first book, "Crape Myrtle."

     I thought it was a good story, and gave her a good review.  Feel free to take a look if you have a Kindle:  http://www.amazon.com/Crape-Myrtle-ebook/dp/B003FL6X6G/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&m=AG56TWVU5XWC2&s=books&qid=1291433442&sr=1-1

     Anyway, we ended up chatting and exchanging an email now and then, and became friends.  Dawne's quite a good writer, and moving up in the world!  She'll still tell you that she's just a small town writer, maybe slightly famous where she lives.  But I think truthfully she's building up quite a following with the stories she's writing.  She has quite a different style of writing than I do, and you might even say she writes in an entirely different genre than I do.  She writes what she describes as "erotic" stories.  Interaction between men and women, where I usually write about a bunch of wild, crazy, characters doing insane things.

     I decided to ask her if she would mind being interviewed for my blog.  I don't have a ton of readers, but the few that I do, I thought might like to meet my friend.  (I also figured I would see if she'll let me post this interview on her facebook page.  She has a lot of fans that might like to read just a bit more about her!  *chuckle*)  So, without further ado, here are the questions I asked her:

You've written and published a number of books so far, do you remember back when you were writing your first? What is its title, and what was it about?

Yes I do. It was the most intense book I've written to date. I spent hours and hours writing, editing, revising and finally selling that book. Crape Myrtle is by far my favorite novel to date. It's a suspense romance about a woman, Sadie Callaghan, and the local sheriff, Walt Malone. Her life is threatened, he's investigating a string of religious vandalisms- with Sadie being a prime suspect and as they clash over the investigations, their feelings and attraction can't be missed.  

I understand you've also just received a contract to publish one of your latest books called "When We Meet Again." Can you tell us a bit about it?

It's a contemporary romance about two friends from high school that were inseparable, and in love but never admitted it to each other. The story takes place over the course of 25 years, from high school through her abusive marriage and divorce, his strained marriage and pending divorce and eventually having them meet up and share their love. It's a story about second chances at love and finding your true love.

I know it's quite a thrill when you get a book published. Does that feeling ever wear off for you? Or are you just as excited each time you get a new book coming out?

It's a feeling that never gets old. Every book release, signed contract and promotion is a new experience for me. My stomach flutters, my nerves are on edge and my psyche gets regenerated for the next novel. 

Ok, here are the obligatory general questions: Tell me a bit about yourself, and how you got into writing.  When did you first know you wanted to be a writer?

I'm mother of three grown children and live in rural Michigan where there's more cows and corn than residents. It's a very serene piece of heaven where I live and I love it.

I'm currently a full time writer. I freelance for a local newspaper, write SEO and web content for various websites and am the Administrative Editor of the WM Review Connection and a Contributing editor for the WM Freelance Writers' website. I also contribute to five blogs weekly and coordinate blog tours for two romance blogs. All in all, I don't have time for another career but I do substitute teach when needed.

I knew I wanted to be a writer during my freshman year of high school. I fell in love with writing during English class when we were asked to write a short story. I dove in, wrote to my heart's desire and never looked back.

My first official and paying writing gig was back in 1999, when I was a freelance writer for a local newspaper. Since then I have worked for four different publications. 

What is your personal favorite of all the writing you've done? Or do you like everything the same?

My personal favorite would have to be Crape Myrtle my first published book. I spent about five years writing, editing and trying to sell the book. I developed a relationship with the characters, rooted for their love and finally felt sadness when their story was complete.

For the last bit, I'd like to ask what's next for you? Do you have any new books, or stories in the works?  (I know you do, but people reading this might not.) Feel free to tell us about anything you'd like, and whatever you're doing now, or in the future!

I'm currently editing When We Meet Again, I have a collection of short erotic stories for adults that I'm always dabbling with in my down time and I just started a new novel about a call-in radio sex therapist and her menagerie of callers with sex issues. This one has humor and is real fun. And finally, I'm collaborating with a friend and fellow writer, Robert Wacaster, on a novel set in 1944 about two high school friends and their long distance love. This is where Robert can fill in the storyline if he wants. I'm real excited about this book and I've never collaborated before so this is real new territory for me.

 Crape Myrtle July 2009

On Her Own- July 2009

When We Meet Again- Valentines' Day 2011

Room 11- February 2011

Rachel's Desire- March 2011

     Ok...so she's going to throw the ball back in my court?  I guess I can spill a bit.  Yes, Dawne and I did decide to work together on a novel.  It's set in 1944 and is about a boy and girl who had feelings for each other in high school.  After graduation, the boy leaves for the army and World War 2 while she stays back in Detroit and ends up doing a "Rosy the Riveter" thing in a factory.  Will she stay loyal to him, or will she find another, closer love while at home and far away from him?  

     This book raises a few challenges for both of us.  We had agreed on trying to make the book as historically correct as we can, which is going to take a LOT of research!  On my side, as I write about the male character (Sam Benson) I want to make certain I write about him going to boot camp at the correct base.  I want to make certain he received his training in the correct places, and most important of all, I want to make certain he ends up in a unit that actually served in Europe, and is in the same places the unit actually was.  Yes, I could make all this stuff up myself, but we decided we didn't want to do that.  The book will still be fiction, it'll just have realistic overtones.

     For Dawne, she's decided she wants to take her research into the factories that were back in Detroit in 1944.  She's already caught me once on the language used back in the 40's, and expects me to keep the 1940's slang.  (A research project in itself!)  She wants to look into hairstyles, clothing, where people went, what they did...I had thought her part of the book might be easier than mine, but I guess not!  She's going to be putting in a ton of work, too!  And we don't even have a title yet!  But since books take months, if not years to write, I think we have time.

     I really want to thank Dawne for letting me interview her today, and for giving me this upcoming chance to collaborate with her.  She's quite a talented woman, and I'm thrilled to work with her!

Thanks, Dawne.

Writing for free money...or just for free.

     I've been on "vacation" the last week or so, and really didn't do anything.  Well, I accomplished a little bit.  I wrote a bit and actually finished reading a book so I could put out a semi-intelligent review.  I'm not one of those maniac critics who will rip a book apart, so my reviews are usually fairly simple.  Either I like your book, or I fake my way through the review.  Ha ha.  Actually, since reviewing things isn't my "real job" I usually only read books I want to read, and so usually give pretty good reviews.  I can't imagine reading a someone's book and then ranting and raving about how bad it was.  If I didn't like the book, why would I read it?

     People think that if you write a book now a days, you're suddenly a millionaire.  If you write a book, you can just quit your job and live the life of luxury!  Fabulous!  Not quite so.  Most of the writers I know are broke.  Well, not broke, but we don't make a ton of money from our writing.  We actually have to have real jobs to get by.  And honestly, I think that's one of the things that makes a good writer.  I know that probably sounds stupid.  But if you're writing just for money, you aren't going to succeed.  If you're writing because you like it, because you like your own stories, that's when the quality comes out.

     Take a look at two of my favorite writers.  They're both probably way more popular than I am.  First is Katie Salidas.  The book I just finished and reviewed is her first novel.  It starts a series called "Immortalis."  It's a vampire book.  Katie's also a hustler.  Not in the bad sense, but I mean she gets out there and pushes her books!  She does book signings, and giveaways, and writes her own blog!  (Only her first book is out in real book form, most of her writing is on Kindle and that kind of thing.)  She's out there!  And believe it, or not, after reading her first book I think she's created a fantastic series!  I mean HBO worthy series!  After seeing some of the crap that's been in the theaters, and on pay television lately, she's much better!  Will she be signing a deal with HBO soon?  Showtime?  Cinemax?  Probably not.  She's an unknown just like me.  That doesn't mean she isn't loaded with talent.  Is she rich from all the writing she's done?  I doubt it.  But still she keeps writing, keeps the world she's created alive.  I'm proud of her!

     I met Katie in person and she signed a neat promo card for me.  She even gave a shot at getting me to get some of my books together and head to a book signing.  She gave me a few hints on how to hustle, too.  Very intelligent woman.  I'm pretty lazy though, and just keep writing.  Maybe someday I'll hustle, or maybe I'll just keep writing and my stuff can become best seller after I die.  

     Katie helps out a lot of other authors by interviewing them on her blog.  http://myimmortalstories.blogspot.com/  I'm learning pretty quickly that there are quite a few independent authors out there willing to help each other out.  Check out her blog, and read her books.  She's good!

     The other author I really like is Steve Morris.  He's English.  That means he lives in England.  He's a teacher, and a much more popular author than I am.  He's been in the papers over there in the U.K!  (That stands for the United Kingdom, if you weren't sure.  Yes, England.)  But does he make enough money to quit teaching and just tour the world signing his books?  No.  He's not an independent author, though.  He does have a publisher.  But still, that doesn't mean he's raking in the dollars...or pounds, or whatever.  He writes because he likes to write.  I've swapped books with him, and he really loved the military book I wrote called Frigate: November.  Don't worry if you haven't heard of it, not too many people have read it.  I enjoyed writing it though, and that's what counts.  I read and reviewed his first book called "In All Probability."  It was a book of short stories.  Good short stories!  He's sent me his newest book called "Jumble Tales" to read and review now.  I've had it a couple of months and haven't gotten to it yet.  I had Katie's book and another couple ahead of his.  But I'll read it now, almost certain I'll love it! He's got a great talent for writing stories with the twist ending.

     So there you have it!  Me and two other authors that have books out there.  We aren't rich, we aren't celebrities, but we are writers.  And one day one of us, or all of us may actually be famous.  And if it ever happens to me, if I ever sell a few million books, or sign a lucrative tv, or movie deal, I think I'll still miss the days when I was trying to type just one, or two more sentences before I had to go to work.  I'll miss the days when I wrote just because I liked writing.

     Support independent writers, unknowns, and see how much talent really is out there!

TSA Density

     It's almost Thanksgiving.  That means time to travel and visit family.  Turkey, football, and the start of insane Christmas shopping.  And of hassling TSA security in airports.  What the hell is wrong with people?  People are now hung up on scanners at the airport.  Back when they started to use x-ray equipment to scan your carry on bags people were upset that it might ruin the film in their cameras.  I can understand that.  You spent a whole week trying to get a picture of Uncle Sid wearing nothing but a fig leaf, and now the airport ruined it!  That's something to protest.  But now people don't want to get in a new full body scanner because someone might see their "junk."  Oh no!  Give me a break!  You people and your "rights" are making me sick!  During the summer I flew through Salt Lake City and went through one of the scanners.  I was more unhappy that I had to pull every scrap of paper out of my pockets, than I was about anyone seeing what I looked like under my clothes.  These people act like they're being asked to march in a naked parade!

     Here's an actual TSA scan.  Scandalous, isn't it?  How horrifying, you can see her gun...I mean boobs!  And you can clearly see that this is...that...I can't tell who this is.  So who is it?  If you go out into the airport and see 50 idiots protesting this machine, which one was the one pictured here?  Probably the one waving the gun and yelling "Wawawawawa!"  But besides that, what "junk" is pictured here?  People just want to protest anything anymore.  They claim they don't have anything to hide, but they don't want to be scanned.  Luckily, no one was protesting the scanner in front of me in line.  If I had missed my plane because some idiot was causing a scene screaming that they didn't want anyone to see their "junk" I think I probably would have kicked them in the their junk!  What is with you stupid people?  Lines at the airport aren't long enough?  You want to make them longer because you're afraid someone might see your private parts?  How many of these idiots refuse to go through a scan on their way flying to a topless beach somewhere?

     Here we have an evil TSA person scanning another woman.  Look at the evil look on her face!  Look how she's ogling the young girl!  Look how...ok, she doesn't really look interested.  This is some good looking girl and the TSA agent isn't really interested.  How about ugly people?  Do you suppose she's interested in them?  Or do you suppose she just wants to get through her shift and go home like everyone else?  Is the TSA somehow only hiring perverts that have an x-ray collection of naked people?  

     If you refuse to go through the scanner, they give you the option to be frisked by hand.  But people don't want to be touched.  "If you touch my junk, I'll sue you!"  How about if you refuse to go through the scanner, we sue you?  A better idea might be if you refuse to be scanned, you don't fly.  If I worked for the TSA and someone refused to go through the scanner, and then threatened to sue me if I touched them when I frisked them, I would just refuse them entry to the boarding area.  "Sorry sir, you present a threat.  Go away."  Then they can sue me, and the airport, and the government, and everyone else and try to prove that all their rights were violated because they refused an airport safety precaution.  

     Now it's a big deal.  Everyone wants to blog about how they hate the new scanners.  They're a violation, they show everything, the TSA is hassling people!  Last year I flew to Florida for my birthday and the TSA agent looked at my driver's license and said, "Happy birthday!"  Was that hassling me?  I was really pleased, and my birthday vacation started out really nice with that comment.  I think these people unhappy with the scanners have a bit too much time on their hands.

     My birthday is coming soon, and you know what I want?  I want a full body scanner.  I want to put it on my porch and use it to scan everyone who comes to visit me.  And don't be protesting it either, or I'll sue you!  HA!