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Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Writing your best

     This is a story I was told way back in Jr. High school in journalism class:

A young writer finishes off college and gets a degree in journalism.  He gets his dream job at a large newspaper and goes to work.  On his first day, he is given an assignment and writes out his article, excited that he'll finally see a story of his in the newspaper.  He submits it, and the next day reads the newspaper from front to back, but his article is nowhere to be found.  He can't believe it!

The next day, after being given his next assignment, he writes it out, but instead of submitting it, he takes it personally into the editor's office and sets it down in front of the editor.  "I'm finished with the story." he says proudly.  The editor doesn't even look up from his desk and says "Is this the best you can do?"  The reporter thinks for a minute and then says "No, I can do better."  He takes he story back to his desk to rework it.

After rewriting the story again, he takes it back to the editor.  The editor asks again "Is this the best you can do?"  The reporter is shocked.  He thinks about it and again says "No, I'm sure I can do better."  He leaves to rewrite the story.  This time, he finds pictures, he uses spell check, he talks to witnesses, he goes all out on the story.  He does an incredible amount of work and then marches back into the editor's office.  As he tosses the story on the editor's desk, the editor asks his question:  "Is this the best you can do?"

The frustrated reporter glares at the editor.  "Yes, this is the best I can do!" he shouts.  The editor now looks at the story placed on his desk and answers "Ok, then I'll read this one."

The moral here is that you need to always put your best stuff out there.  

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Day #7...End of the week.

Ok, I'm aggravated.  Well, kind of aggravated.  Long, stupid night at work last night.  I won't even go into what went on in that evil, little pyramid!  (Yes, little.  Check out the dimensions of one of the pyramids in Egypt sometime!)

But my work week, and blog week is over!  This is the last blog of the exercise!  Now I can go back to writing sarcastic remarks about tourists who run around in their underwear with no ID!  Hooray!

A friend named Kallypso Masters just self published a book called Masters at Arms.  It's the first book of a series she's writing.  She has it out for only 99 cents on the Kindle!  99 CENTS, people!  You can spare a penny less than a buck, can't you?  I did.  And I might even read the book soon!  *chuckle*  Ok, yes, I will read and review her book.  First, I need to finish the current book I'm reading.  It's just a few pages shorter than War and Peace.  I've been working on this one for something like three months now, I'll be the author thinks I took the book, but wasn't going to do a review!  I will, though.  It's just taking me forever to get through his book.

Anyway, go to Amazon and buy Masters at Arms for your Kindle.  And if you don't have a Kindle...well...but one anyway, it's less than a dollar for crying out loud!  *chuckle*  And thus ends my week of blogs, and my commercial for Masters at Arms.

Also go and buy my books!  *chuckle*

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Day #6...The Moon

Ok, here we go.  I'm up and awake after a nice sleep and ready to put out the blog for Day # 6.  Last night was a full moon (or close enough to it).  Of course, sitting over Vegas that's like a bug zapper for human bugs.  It brings all the idiots to the Strip.

Can you see it way up there at the top?  That just usually means the exceptionally stupid will come into the casino.  I was supposed to be working on the casino floor, but I go into work and find out I'm now suddenly stuck in the booth again.  I'm very unhappy!  But, thanks to a guy named Vic, I was able to trade off the booth position and work in the hotel.  Thanks Vic!  That entailed mostly walking around in the hallway, helping a few of the bugs...uh...guests who were locked out, but didn't have any identification on them.  Who walks around without any ID?  I still can't figure out why you would walk around in a casino with no ID?  Do these people go out at home without a wallet?  I mean, I understand they're on vacation, but when I go somewhere for vacation I always have my wallet on me!  

People get into a cab and arrive at the hotel, but don't have any money on them to pay the cab driver.  They go into the cafe, order food and eat it, but don't have any money on them to pay.

"I'll just go up to my room and come back with the money later.", you won't.  Do these people eat at a restaurant at home and then pull this kind of shit?  Why would you think you could possibly eat and then come back later, if you felt like it, with money?

Ok, enough rambling about stupid people in the casino.  After work I decide I want a cheeseburger.  I hit the Jack in the Box drive thru on my way home and end up right at the window waiting for my food!  Soon there's a guy in another car behind me, and then another couple of people behind him!  I'm first in line though, hooray!  He starts to get impatient and begins honking his horn at me!  I'm still waiting for my food!  I get sick of his honking his horn, I'm tired, I'm getting mad, so finally I put my car in reverse and stepped on the gas.  I went backwards and smashed into him.  Then I pulled forward and went backwards a few more times, making sure I destroyed the idiot's headlights!  He starts to get out of his car...

Ok, most of that last paragraph was bologna.  *chuckle*  I did go to Jack in the Box, but the guy behind me was patient, he didn't honk, and I didn't back into him.  But I did get some good food.  And since I was hungry and tired, I ate and went to bed.  That's why I didn't write the blog until tonight.  *chuckle*

Ok, one more day to go with this little exercise.  Tune in tomorrow and see how boring the last day is!  Hooray!

Friday, August 12, 2011

Day #5...The Tire

Ok, for today since it was a work day I slept most of the day like normal.  I did get up a bit early to watch some football, but it really wasn't that good of a game played by two teams I consider mediocre losers.  Anyway, I went to work.  I did remember to take a picture this time on my way inside.

Really pretty?  Just a normal night to me.  So I headed inside and did my dispatch thing.  After work, a bike officer mentioned to me that one of my rear tires looks really low and seems a bit soft.  I check it out, and the tire does look about half flat.  Phooey!  I figure I can stop on the way home and just put some air in it no problem.  I check a few different gas stations, and all of these damned places want $1  for air!  A fucking dollar!  (Yes, I just swore, get over it.)  Finally, I picked one near a car wash where I could get some change and forked over the dollar.  I can't believe you can't get air for free anymore!  Sheesh!

I also end up texting a friend and telling her I think she would look good in a military with a skirt.  *chuckle*  She says the skirt would have to be short.  I mention the Air Force skirts came to about the woman's knees.  I'm thinking back while telling her this about a girl named Claudia.  While we were in Texas she did wear the Air Force skirt a few times and always looked great!  I do wish I had a picture of her to show my friend!  (If you actually ever read this Claudia, you should send me a picture of you in the uniform skirt, you looked great!)

I forgot to take a picture of the casino on my way out because I was worrying about the tire.  At least I took one before going in, though!  So now I'll probably pout about paying a dollar for some air for the rest of the morning!

Two more days to go documenting what I do...sort of.  Tune in tomorrow and find out what else I end up having to pay for!  Oy!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Day day...or night

Today's blog will be short and sweet.  Well, probably not sweet.  I slept all day yesterday and then headed to work.  I had planned to take a picture of the casino after I had parked and was on my way inside.  Instead, I wan't happy, got distracted by stupid drivers and stomped my way inside without taking a picture.  I'll just substitute a picture, how's that?

Whoo!  Look at all the snow!  Look at's still summer, isn't it?  Oh well, pretend it's winter and enjoy the snowy pyramid.  Anyway, I end up spending most of my night sitting in the security "podium."  I hate working there.  Most of my night was pointing towards the bathroom and then listening to people repeat "where?" back at me.  I always want so bad to say, "I'm not sure, I didn't see where I was pointing either!"

I did escape, so to speak, from the booth (Podium, whatever the damn thing is!) for a bit when I was sent down for a "CPR refresher course" where I tried to bring a mannequin back to life by doing CPR on it.  I don't think it worked, but I did pass the class. 

Now I'm going to have a snack and then go to bed so I can wake up early and try to watch some football!  (Actually, I'll probably just keep hitting snooze on the alarm and sleep through most of the football.  But we'll see.)

Ok, tune in again tomorrow to be bored reading about another work night!

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Day #3...Did nothing, phooey!

Ok, watch the video if you haven't already.  Yes, all 4:35 of it!  WHAT'S GOING ON?  Not much to write about today, but I loved the video and the song.  The lip synching is great, too!  *chuckle*  I also noticed that you never see "He Man" in the video, only "Prince Adam."  I also loved the cook stirring the pot while these guys are yowling away!  If you actually did watch the whole video, you see the cook again at the very end.  Ok, yes, go back and watch again and I'll wait.

I again stayed on my grave schedule and slept all day.  After getting up, I wanted to do something, but it was a bit late.  At least for shopping and such.  I didn't really get moving until around 7:30 pm.  So I headed out to get some groceries and thought maybe I'd look around a bit, too.  First, I had to deposit a check in the bank.  I figured I'd use the ATM since I hate dealing with people, especially people in a bank!  It's been so long since I've had a check to put in the bank, I figured you still needed an envelope, and had to write your account number on it, and do a whole production like that.  But NO!

After putting my card into the ATM, it tells me to just slide the check in.  That was it.  It then even printed out a deposit receipt with a picture of the check on it for me!  I loved it!  I wish I had more checks to deposit now!  (Hopefully that'll happen soon.)

So I moved on and figured I'd look around in Best Buy.  I love electronic things.  Still trying to save my money until I can build my account up a bit, so I didn't really buy anything.  But it was still neat to look around.

I leave there and head to Walmart for the groceries.  No, you don't get to see a picture of the Walmart, they all look the same.  BUT, I decide to stop and look in this little comic book store nearby!  It's been...well...decades since I've been in a comic book store, I want to buy a few!  I get to the door and see they close at 8pm.  It's 7:57.  Oh well, no comic books then.

Then I bought my groceries and went home.  The only other thing I figured was notable was that I bought some BBQ Corn Nuts.  It's been years since I've had any of those, and they were always good.  So I figured I'd try a few now.  Also stopped at Carl's Jr on the way home and bought a mushroom burger meal.  That's basically a mushroom burger with fries and a drink.  It cost me almost $10!  Sheesh!

You should play the youtube video I have posted while you read the rest of the post.  Then you have some theme music for my day.  *chuckle*  I'll have to do that for tomorrow's post.  I go back to work tomorrow night, so I won't write and post the blog until I come home in the morning.  And no, I won't talk about anything that goes on at work...probably...unless it's something that really pissed me off.  We'll find out, though.  I'll have to find a theme song for how my night at work goes, too.

So it looks like Day #4 won't be up until...I guess the morning of 8/11/11.  Stay tuned, and be bored by how my day (night) went!

Monday, August 8, 2011

Day #2 Something more exciting

Ok, here we are on day two of my blog exercise.  I kept on my graveyard schedule and slept until around 4:30.  I ran a few errands, and then didn't really want to come home and write about how I didn't really do anything.  Who the hell wants to read that?  And this blog is supposed to be about Vegas adventures, isn't it?  (Well, adventures, bitches, my opinions...blah, blah, blah.)

Anyway, I decided to drive to Caesar's Palace.  And, since I haven't been there in a long, long time, I of course got lost.  I could see the casino, but couldn't get to it.  I'm on the wrong side of the freeway, now I'm on the wrong side of town, now I'm going back the wrong way...I almost got frustrated enough to just turn around and go home!  (If I could find my way there...for crying out loud!)

I finally make it into the parking garage and head inside.  I figured I could take some pictures and show off where I was to people who might not have been here before.  Caesar's has been here for decades.  And by decades, I mead DECADES!  It's went through a ton of changes, but they do pretty much still maintain the...feel of the place, I guess you'd say.  I stood in the casino wondering if I could somehow take a little bit of video and see if it actually gave you the feel of being there!  It doesn't.  But take a look anyway:

I took a walk through the casino and found the front desk.  Not really thrilling for me, but if you've seen the movie "The Hangover" this is where they checked into the hotel.

Notice the two little children rolling around on the floor!  I'm sure mommy and daddy are very proud!  Or gambling somewhere not watching their kids...anyway, moving on:

A casino is a casino to me...also since they had security watching the pits, I couldn't get any pictures of the pits.  People betting $100,000 a hand don't like having their picture taken sometimes.  *chuckle* So I moved on to look around at the shops where I could never afford anything.  Not things just a bit out of my price range, but things like this:  A Faberge pendant.  They guy inside looked like he wanted to charge me $100 just for looking at the damned thing!  But I fixed him, I took a picture and am posting it here in my blog!  HA!

Oh, I should stop and eat at Spago!  Hooray, a world famous restaurant, I wonder if Wolfgang is in?  Probably not.  And no, I didn't eat there.  To be honest, eating out near all the people walking around would make me nervous.  I don't want to eat near a bunch of pushing, shoving tourists!

Something a bit more...contemporary would probably suit me better.  Oh, here's one!  Planet Hollywood!  Uh...there is a casino down the street owned by Planet Hollywood, too.  Once again, I'm not going to eat here, too many ignorant tourists (and probably ignorant locals, too.)

Maybe a bar would be better.  I don't drink, but back out in the casino there is a small place called...

Can you read it?  The place is called "numb."  I wonder if the drinks are called numb, too?  

"Hi, I'd like some numb."

"The drinks MAKE you numb, they aren't called numb."

"Oh, I see.  Give me a blue one, it'll look nice when I'm good and numb and throwing it up in the coy pond over near the front desk!"

Back to the shops.  Oh look, here's a nice place!  I'll just get my credit card out and...oh, on second thought, looking at the brand name, I couldn't afford any of this stuff.  And besides, at the moment I don't have a girl to give any of it to.  Although I'm pretty sure if I could afford this stuff, a girl would show up ready to have it given to her.

I keep walking and find a shop that freaks me out so much, I won't go near it.  No one should be allowed to have this many mannequins!  This many is just...spooky!  Can you tell how many in this are mannequins and how many are real people?  Just...creepy!

Ok, I've had about enough of Caesar's and the crowds.  I'm ready to end my little trip to the Strip and head home.  I'll pop a couple more pictures up here before I go, though:

Ok, that's all for today's adventures.  I went somewhere and took some pictures.  Hooray!  Now I think it's time for me to get some "numb" of my own!

Tune in again tomorrow and I'll bore you some more!

Sunday, August 7, 2011

A look at Robert's week, day #1

Ok folks, as a writing exercise I've decided to spend seven fun filled days writing about my days.  Thoughts, pictures, whatever.  I wanted to see if I would actually have anything to write about, so here goes.  Living in Las Vegas doesn't necessarily mean that every day is full of fantastic excitement, though.  Today, for example, was probably a pretty boring day to write about.  I slept most of the day, and then drove over to visit my friend "Chinstrap."  No, you don't get to see a picture of him.  His girlfriend actually made a fantastic dinner, and I do want to tell her thank you, I wasn't really that hungry, but what I did eat was really delicious!  So thanks, Chun!  (Yes, her name is Chun, and being Chinese, she made Chinese food for dinner.  Trust me when I say there's nothing better than home made Chinese food made by someone who is really Chinese!) that I think about it, I probably should have taken a picture of the food.  Oh well, write and learn, right?

Chinstrap and I were talking about security, and a few other things, and he starts to tell me he wants to find and buy something called a "Slap Jack."  He finds a picture online and shows me.  It's a lead filled piece of leather that you can used to smash someone across the face with.  Well, across the face, in the ribs, on the get the idea.  He tells me this story of a relative who while working in law enforcement had used one to smack a guy across the face after the guy had spit on him.  I guess he knocked out a lot of the guy's teeth. 

So where was I?  Oh yes, we had this lovely dinner and were discussing...uh...not much else to say about tonight.  We did exchange a few videos, and then I headed home.  So now tonight, I'll probably watch some tv, and play a video game, or two and relax.  Then tomorrow, I'll remember to take some pictures and try to do something semi-exciting for my day off and post a few pictures.

So tune in tomorrow for day #2!  It can only get better from here, folks.  *chuckle*

Thursday, August 4, 2011


War.  Wars start because one idiot doesn't like another idiot.  World War One was started after the Archduke Franz Ferdinand of Austria was assassinated.  And yes, I looked that up.  It doesn't say who assassinated him though, or even why.  Did he not invite someone to a party, did he make fun of some guy on the street, or was it truly a political thing?  It doesn't really matter, because I'm not actually going to write about WW I.

I'm just...confused about a different kind of war I'm seeing now.  Some people might call it a war of information.  Just like most other people, I'm a member of Facebook.  And I post things on there once in a while, like this blog.  Recently, I've been seeing some people post some really nasty things on there.  Not just nasty, but sometimes aimed at other people!  People that they have on their friends list! they want a war of words with a friend?  I don't understand...

Herman:  I think people who eat cheese are stupid!  Cheese sucks!

Wally:  I actually like cheese.  There are all kinds, maybe you just need to try a few different kinds?

Herman:  You're a moron, you cheese eating, slimy, communist!  

Wally:  I just thought you might have gotten some bad cheese, or something?

Herman:  Screw you, cheese sleaze!

These are friends?  Now obviously this isn't a real conversation on Facebook.  You can probably tell because it's just written in red and blue and doesn't even really look like Facebook posts.  But you get the idea.  And no, there isn't really a fight going on about cheese!  At least not that I know of.  But it's the general idea.  Someone posts their political theory, someone else bad mouths it, and then we have a war of words going on.  I don't want to read this stuff!  What the hell?  I have enough animosity in my own life to keep me occupied, why do I have to read about why Herman hates people who eat cheese?  (Wow, here I am back at cheese again...I must be hungry.)

I want to read the pleasant posts.  A post about how my niece is doing in collage.  See a picture of my friend's horses, or the goat next door!  (I actually meant a goat.  Some friends live on farms, I didn't really mean an old man.  *chuckle*)  We're supposed to be friends on here!  Now people are getting offended by something someone writes and then the "de-friending" starts.  

Wally:  I de-friended someone because he called me a cheese sleaze!

Herman:  I had to de-friend this cheese eating commie the other day!

For crying out loud!  You know, I actually signed up for Facebook to promote my books.  And while on here I've made some really good friends, and reunited with some people from way back, too!  And for the most part, it's been pretty damned nice!  I've even made one, or two business connections for my writing.  But enough with the war of words, ok?  

Stop the bullshit and let's all be friends again.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011


I love amusement parks.  Who doesn't, right?  As a kid, you want to ride everything!  Well, not as a kid, but maybe as a stupid teenager?  Little kids are smart enough to stay off of some rides.  But some of them really can give a rush, I guess?  Here's a video of one I came across at a place in Ohio called Kings Island.  At the very end, a guy comes out of his seat and goes flying across the park!  ... ... ... Ok, that's actually a lie.  No one falls off, but it sure looks like someone is about to, doesn't it?

That's a safe ride.  But that's not what people want, is it?  We want unsafe rides.  People may say they want safe rides, but does this look safe?

Oh yeah, these people will have fun, won't they?  I'll bet vomit can be shot half a mile away if they spin the propeller fast enough!  Or maybe we can corrupt a safe ride and make it unsafe?  No one does that, do they?  Uh...

Nothing can go wrong there, right?  Oh yeah, he's real safe.  Someone please tell me this picture is photoshopped, or something!  Wow, people will just do anything, won't they?  Sheesh!  Personally, I'm going to stick with the safer rides.  Well...ok, maybe not the safest ones.  I do have an appreciation for this whiplash machine:

And because I know some of you are reading this and expecting me to show you some kind of ride accident, carnage, or something like you go:  This is what you get when you allow idiots to ride the duckies!

What did you think was going to happen?  *chuckle*