The World of the Dumb
I live in America, home
to some pretty stupid and selfish people.
Have you ever just looked around you and wondered how some people can be
as dumb or selfish as they are? We’ve
made natural selection pretty much irrelevant for the human race now. The weak and stupid people don’t die out,
some of them go on to be pretty successful! But the stupid and selfish people aren't just Americans. Let’s take a look at the wonderful world of the dumb:
We start in Toronto,
Canada. Welcome to the Great White
North! Some people speak French here and
Toronto will obviously vote for just about anyone for mayor. How about a crack head? Sure, why not? Meet Toronto mayor Rob Ford. Rob likes to get drunk and smoke crack. Here’s a fun little news story about Rob:
Toronto
mayor: ‘Yes, I have smoked crack cocaine’
AARON
HARRIS/Reuters
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Canadian
politics and politicians tend to get little attention in the United States.
That changed dramatically in November when Toronto mayor Rob Ford admitted he
had smoked crack cocaine. Allegations of the mayor’s drug use came up after a
video surfaced showing Ford smoking crack. Ford denied the video existed until
police said they had obtained a copy in the course of a drug investigation
against a friend of Ford’s.
“Yes,
I have smoke crack cocaine, “ Ford told reporters Nov. 5, “There have been
times when I’ve been in a drunken stupor. That’s why I want to see the tape.”
So Rob admits he smoked
crack cocaine. How nice! He’s also a known drunkard and seems to be
hated, reviled, and embarrasses people in Toronto. So how did he even get elected as mayor? Rob says he wants to see “the tape”? Well then, let’s look at some video. I especially love the shirtless man standing
behind him who is continuously yelling “Resign, resign!”
Well there you go. You silly Canadians elected a drunken crack
head to the post of mayor! What could be
dumber than that? Maybe electing a crack
head mayor TWICE? Here in American in
the quaint little place we call the District of Columbia (That’s where
Washington DC is!) back in 1979 they elected a guy named Marion Barry Jr. mayor. In 1990 Marion was videotaped smoking crack
cocaine and arrested on drug charges by the FBI. Not the police, the Federal Bureau of
Investigation arrested him! And then
after his arrest Marion went to a federal prison for six months. That meant that Marion couldn’t run for
reelection. Was that the last of
Marion? Hell no! He ran for mayor again in 1995 after getting
out of prison and was again voted in as mayor!
He cleaned himself up though, right?
WRONG!
On October 28, 2005, Barry pleaded guilty to
the misdemeanor charges
stemming from an IRS investigation. The mandatory drug testing for the hearing
showed Barry as being positive for cocaine and marijuana. On March 9, 2006, he
was sentenced to three years of probation for misdemeanor charges of failing to pay federal and
local taxes, and underwent drug counseling.
So here in America we
voted in a crack cocaine and pot smoking tax evader as mayor of the nation’s
capital city. Lovely. Well at least things couldn’t get worse for
Marion, right? RIGHT?
On July 4, 2009, Barry was taken into custody
by the Park Police after political consultant Donna Watts-Brighthaupt, his
ex-girlfriend, claimed he was stalking her. Barry was arrested and charged with "misdemeanor stalking". Following an interview with authorities,
he was released on citation and told he must appear before the Superior Court of the
District of Columbia on July 9. However,
all charges were dropped on July 8.
Oh geez.
Ok, let’s move on from Marion.
The more you look at him, the worse things get.
So how about me? Here I
am going on and on about stupid people voting crack heads into political
office. Have I ever voted for a crack
head myself? No! Actually, Hell No! I wouldn’t waste my vote on someone like
that! I will however vote for someone
crazy. Sadly, the one crazy person I can
remember voting for died. She was a
judge and her name was Elizabeth Halverson.
Ok, that was her “married” name.
She was only a judge for less than five months after getting
elected and then she was suspended. That just meant she had to stay home and watch Captain Kangaroo instead of going to the courthouse and being a judge. She still received her $130,000 a year pay during her suspention. I'm all for that, crazy people have bills too. Did I know she was crazy before
I voted for her? Oh yes. I definitely knew. I had heard things. I had no idea HOW crazy she really was, but I
knew she was nuts. Not only was she
crazy, she was huge. By huge, I mean she
was HUGE!
Take a look at that huge bundle of love! She couldn’t really walk well and so she rode
around on one of those scooter things. A
Rascal, or whatever it’s called. I
helped elect her with my vote and then the madness started.
She was always in the news and always for something that I thought was
hilarious! She used to sleep through
court proceedings. She was accused of “tainting”
juries and two cases ended up as mistrials.
She was accused of making her court bailiff give her massages, bring her
blankets when she wanted to nap, and put her shoes on her feet. She supposedly harassed everyone around her.
Her bailiff eventually testified against her in court about
how he was “abused”. He sits there on
the stand screaming about “America”. If
he was so abused, why didn’t he find another job? We can quit in America. *chuckle*
Let’s go to the video tape!
And just when you think someone can’t get any crazier, they
do. After being removed from the bench
Judge Halverson had a bit of a problem with her husband at home. Ok, it was more than a bit of a problem. He slammed her in the head with a frying
pan. She may have been crazy, but you
can’t hit people with frying pans! Not
even if they’re crazy and annoy you! Her
husband was quickly arrested and ended up doing a few years in prison. And then she finally died. Would I vote for her again if she hadn’t
died? You can damned well bet I
would! A lot of crazy things go on in
Las Vegas, why shouldn’t we have a crazy judge?
So our last video will be a short one about my favorite judge.
So what’s the point of this blog? I don’t know.
I guess I just found some of the politicians funny and wanted to write
about them. Go out and vote for who you
want and I’ll vote for who I want.
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