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Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Dense and famous

     What does it take to be a celebrity today?  Apparently all you have to do is be really rich, and really stupid.  You can be like Charlie Sheen and act all crazy.

"Yeah, I'm on a drug, it's called the Charlie Sheen!"

     Yeah, it's called something all right, Charlie.  But he's not the only one, he's just the current one.  And do I blame him for this?  No, not really.  Just be a moron, and you get everything.  I work with stupid, cowardly people, but they aren't famous because they aren't rich.  I'm not even sure how some of them pay their bills!  But if you've got a lot of money and are stupid, you get to have a lot of attention.

     Let's move on from Charlie and take a look at a few other "winners."  How about Paris Hilton?  Now there's a rocket scientist, huh?  Let's take a look at a couple of her quotes:

"All British people have plain names, and that works pretty well over there."

     Does this make any sense to anyone?  Plain names?  Who even makes quotes like this?  At least most of the British people weren't named after the city their father probably knocked their mother up in!  Hopefully all the British people are offended by this.

"I love Africa in general, South Africa and West Africa, they are both great countries."

     "West Africa?" I guess the Hilton family makes up it's own geography?  She thinks they're both "great countries."  I'm sure the Hilton family is so proud!  And finally, one of my favorites:

"I don't like parties past 2am.  Then it's all losers and weirdos."

     I get the feeling that her parties are full of losers and weirdos no matter what time it is!  The party wouldn't have losers and weirdos if you didn't invite them, would it?  Does she just go to public parties with people she doesn't know?  I get the feeling she doesn't really know anyone, though.  All that matters to this moron is herself.  Ask her, she'll tell you how important she is.  *chuckle*

     Here's a story I found online while trying to look up these stupid quotes.  I'm not sure who wrote it, and it's not about anyone famous, but it shows why we think these crazy, stupid celebrities are so cool!

"I was at the checkout of a Kmart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave it back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor and gave her the money back. She became indignant and informed me she was educated and knew what she was doing and returned the money again. I gave her the money back again ... same senario ! I departed the store with the $46.64."

     Yay, Kmart!  They hire the best people, don't they?  So is it any wonder now why the average person thinks so highly of someone who was arrested with a purse full of cocaine and told the police she thought it was "gum?"

     Moving on, as Groucho Marx said, "A child of 5 would understand this.  Send someone to fetch a child of 5."

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

     That one came from Mariah Carey.  Not self centered, or anything, is she?  She cried because she wants to be skinny.  Oy.

"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."

     Mayor Marion Barry!  This is the crackhead who was elected mayor.  It was public knowledge that he smoked crack, and he was still elected.  How do you wake up after smoking crack and think to yourself, "Hey, I want to be a mayor!"  Unreal.  And if you don't count the killings, their crime rate is low, huh?  I guess killing isn't a crime if you need crack?

"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa."

     Another geography expert, Britney Spears.  I like a few of the songs she's done, but even they don't make any sense.  I still can't figure out what she means when she sings "Hit me baby, one more time!"  I wonder if someone did hit her, would it knock some sense into her?

     I could obviously go on and on.  As you can see, I'm bored as hell this week, and didn't know what to write.  So I guess I'll end this here.  I'd like to suggest to people that if you don't know what the hell you're talking about, keep your mouth shut.  But that won't happen.  So as George W. Bush said, "Don't misunderestimate me." whatever the hell that means.

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