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Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Powdered gum

     Today I was reading about Paris Hilton.  She was arrested for possession of cocaine.  The baggie of cocaine fell out of her purse in front of a cop.  This was actually while she was demanding to be "taken to the bathroom" with her purse, I guess.  After it fell out she said she thought it was "gum."  I did a search online because I want to have some "powdered gum" too!  I couldn't find any.  I guess she also decided to say the purse wasn't hers.  It probably had her ID and wallet inside it, but it wasn't hers.  I thought about posting a picture here, but I don't want to sully my blog like that.

     So, now some highly paid Hilton attorney is going to go into court and claim the purse and "powdered gum" didn't belong to this moron.

"Your Honor, she was carrying a friend's purse!  It's always fun to carry a friend's purse around!  What?  Who's purse was it?  Oh, we can't release that information!"

And then he'll claim she thought it was "powdered gum."  I'd like to ask how much of the "gum" she chewed.  It must be some kind of special "Hilton" gum.  Can these people get any sleazier?

     What happens in becomes world wide news!  I guess she was let out of jail after only two hours without even paying any bail.  She was arrested for a felony, but didn't need bail.  I wonder if I would get out without bail if I was chewing some "powdered gum?"  The idiot she was with was busted for misdemeanor "driving while impaired" or something like that.  He had to pay $2,000 in bail to get out of jail.  So how does she just walk away from a felony, but he has to bail out for a misdemeanor?  I guess that's the magic of Nevada!  Come here if you're rich and famous!  If you aren't, don't be caught with any "powdered gum."

     She was busted on the Las Vegas Strip, and claimed to be "embarrassed" when a huge crowd began to form around the car and take pictures.  She was embarrassed just because she had a load of "powdered gum" in her purse, and the driver, or "boyfriend" she was with was failing all the sobriety tests the cop was giving him?  How odd!  I guess the police took her over to the Wynn hotel and security offered to let the police put her in their holding room.  (That would be what's called a C.S.O. if you're curious.  Casino Security Office.)  Yay security! 

     I tried to upload the police report to here, but it wouldn't work just because it's in a pdf file.  It doesn't matter, you can find it online probably everywhere by now.  Freedom of information, hooray! 

     Her "boyfriend" was a guy named "Cy Waits."  And after being arrested, he had to "Waits" to post bail and get out of jail.  HA HA HA HA HA!  I guess he was a big partner in a club in the Wynn hotel.  "Was" being the key word.  He was supposedly "fired."  But how do you fire a "partner?"  I guess by giving him some "powdered gum" to carry around in his purse?

And life goes on...

1 comment:

  1. Hey just so you know Buzzard she was also "86d" from Wynn and Encore. Even more funny.....

    Your friend Chinstrap...